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I first knew i was gay when i was 12. Well i thought i was bi, i had a boyfriend and found several of my female friends attractive, before this i had other boyfriends, but this was my first kind of serious relationship. I then had another relationship with a boy, this was when i was 13. I found that it really wasnt right and thats when i realised that I wasnt attracted to males, it was weird. I felt i was only being straight because i had to be, because everyone else around me was. So i told my boyfriend i didnt want a boyfriend and just left it there, he accepted that and is now just a friend who i talk to a lot.

The first person who i told i was gay to was one of my best friends at the time. She knew, from about the same time as me. She was the only person who knew for a while, then i started to go onto internet sites and flirt with girls.

Several months later i came out to a group of close friends on a night out, they were all fine with it, and my new best friend (The other best friend moved schools and sadly we lost touch) told me she was bi, i was suprised at this but pleased because she is stunning.

So after a while and telling more and more people i was gay, including my brother who was fine with it, i started having a relationship with my best friend - the stunning one.

After being with my girlfriend for a while i decided to tell my parents that i was gay. They were also fine with it. I feel as though maybe my mother isnt pleased about it, but shes coming to terms with it, my fathers really fine with it. They both treat me the same and nothings changed, im still their daughter and ive been accepted for who i am.

For anyone coming out the best thing to do it start telling people when you feel as though you can and are ready for it. I can remember when i realised i was gay i had a very down period in which i lost all of my confidence and found it hard to do things i enjoyed and be motivated. Talking to a close friend really helped. I suggest that everyone talks to someone about it when theyre ready because its not something you should be scared of, but something you should be proud of. You are yourself and that is all that matters. Thanks.

Emma

Hey! I'm Emma and when i was 12 i kinda figured that i might be gay! i was reading a magazine article and i went to myself 'she's pretty...' and then it hit me! all the feelings i had had for the girls in my class, female teachers and other females were gay feelings! it all made sense then!

however, i then made the mistake of telling one of my good friends at school! she was fine with it but someone else heard and spread it around the whole school... not very nice!!! i got horrible looks and nasty comments for the whole of year 8 and the whole of year 9. i thought that there was something wrong with me or something!

i avoided talking to people who were calling me names like 'dirty lesbian' and things like that, but they always managed to find me in the end. i even started self-harming because i was getting bullied so much!

now, things are better... the bulling has died down a bit and i haven't self-harmed in 15 weeks! as for my parents... well... i did tell them but i think my mum thought it was just a phase and ignored it. although i am a bit confused now as i like my best male mate! it's very confusing!!! oh well... plenty of time!

Shelly

A couple of years ago I wrote to the problem page here, confused, scared, ashamed, alone and totally in love with a straight girl. Since then alot has changed, but alot has also stayed the same. Being completely head over heels in love made hiding my sexuality harder and harder. So eventually I told my good old straight open minded friend. I knew she'd be totally cool with it and she was. Yet it was still the scariest thing I ever did, it changed everything. Suddenly I felt free, I felt happy with who I was for the first time in my life. However for 6 months I told no one else, and living a 'double life' started to drain me. Eventually I got up the courage and took a risk by telling someone who's reaction I really couldn't begin to guess. Yet surprised as I was at the time, she was totally fine with it. Eventually all of my friends at the time found out. It was the strangest feeling, it was a strange time. I went from knowing I wasn't straight but still being slightly confused, to being known and accepted as gay. I felt liberated and everyone was so positive that I just accepted what they thought I was. Before that time I'd never really labelled myself, I knew I was in love with a girl, still didn't make me completely gay though but suddenly I just was. When I started college I was kind of unsure of how I was gona handle coming out. In the end, I found it easier to just mention in conversations how I'd had feelings for girls before. No one ever questioned it really, they just assumed I was bi, but yet again no one cared. So the point is, what am I? With all this coming out to other people, I never really officially came out to myself. The truth is I'm still not entirely sure if I'm gay or bi, but I don't care. The day I stopped trying to label myself, everything seemed so simple suddenly. The people around me just accept that I'm me, and really that's all I am.
My only advice for other people is don't stress! Sure, I was so lucky that everyone around me were supportive. But it really isn't as bad as you think it is, you are you, nothing more, nothing less, as long as you're honest with yourself, that's all that really matters. Rushing to try and label yourself sometimes just confuses you more.

Carlos

For all who read this, which I'm actually hoping is not a lot, I wish that when you came out, that everyone was understanding, okay, here it goes. My name is Carlos DeLaTorre, I am 14 years old, yeah, I know, 14, a little bit too young to be already out of the closet. I live in Houston, Texas, no I a not a cowboy or one of those people, saying y'all all the time. I say you all.

I have been fourteen for about three months, and I came out on my 14th birthday, it was May 14th. Now, on that day, I didn't want to celebrate my birthday, like with a party, I wanted to just tell my parents that I was gay. On that day, I spent the whole day with friends, friends who I told I was gay, and they were definitely okay with it, they didn't freak out or anything. I wouldn't be hanging out with them if they weren't okay with it. I ahven't told a lot of my friends, just told a couple, mainly girls. Actually, I ahven't told my guy friends at all, they won't take it well. See, I have one gay friend, who is in total denial about it, and when he's ready, I'll be there helping.

He's my best friend and I just love him, not in that way, but I just love him. He's hot too. Huh. Well, I'm actually starting to get off topic. Where were we? Oh, yeah, my birthday. Okay, me and my parents,plus my brother, his wife and my sister, went out for some dinner, some good cuisine. We finally got back home, and we have this porch swing out in the front next to the garden area, and my older brother, as usual, was asking me if I liked boys or girls. I started to cry, because everytime he'd asked that I had been lieing, and finally he told me, it doesn't matter who I liked, whether it was boys or girls. I started to cry more, and finally I walked away and grabbed my mothers arm telling her that I needed to talk to her, that it was important. For those reading, you can't see me right now, and that's good because I don't want you all to see my cry, give me a minute.

Okay, I'm better now, I took my mom into the living room, and I told her that I was gay. She started to cry saying that I couldn't do this to her, that I can't be gay, that I was joking with her. I usually do joke to her about this. My dad walked in, saw my mom crying, and finally I told him. He was saying that it wasn't right, but he'll live with it. He kept repeating that it wasn't right, that it wasn't right, and I just hated it, I hated it. My brother walked in, took her away and comforted her. My dad went with them, and I turned off the light to the living room and cried for fifteen minutes. What I ended up finding out later that night was that my mom was crying for about 30 minutes. I went outside to the porch with the phone, but I couldn't call Jake, I really couldn't not yet anyway.

I went back to check on my mom, and my older brother was saying that he doesn't recommmend me talking to her, so I didn't for one full week. To this day, she talks to me as if I had never come out to the closet, and asks me if I had yet to meet a girlfriend, I nod along saying not yet. It kills me when she does that, it kills me. My parents never really looked at me the same, but over time, I know they will be excepting. Right after my birthday, they took me to a counselor to talk about my issues. What I had told that counselor, was my darkest secret, bigger than being gay, bigger than when I cried to the Friends finale, bigger than when Brad Pitt broke Jennifer's heart. What I told him was that I slept with a guy on February 5th,2005, when I was only 13. The guys name was Steven, very hot, very sexy, very big at where it counts, huh. It was a Saturday at a One Act Play Contest. We didn't win, but I scored. I got more jokes to come.

The joke, though, was on me, I regret it everyday of my life. larry, my counselor, is still the only one who knows about this, and I think it will stay like that for a while. Steven was 15, and we had been going to these competitions for a while, Drama competitions mostly. We went to the bathroom, and he kissed, he said he didn't mean it and apoligized for it, but than I went in and kissed me, and from there on I was not a virgin no more. It was both of ours first time, and to today, it has been my only time. We talked to each oter after that for a while, meeting at the library, going to a movie, making out in the bathroom. But it din't work out.

It was okay though, because i got a lot of experience out of it. I know, I couldn't have another relationship like that behind my parents back, so I told them. Now, I am happy because I told them, I still have to get through, but to everyone who is reading and hasn't come out of the closet, here is what I have to say, if you want to be happy and live a life that you are meant to live, than be honest and don't hide it, embrace it. From the words of a dear friend, follow your heart, follow your inner path, and follow some tail.

There still is one thing left I have to say, I found out I was gay when I was 12 because I just knew, a year and a half later after hundreds of lies I finally was honest, and now, even though I'm young, I'm not scared to flirt with the guy sitting at the table next to me at Starbuck's, even though he's twice my age, hey, he gave me his number, actually a fake number, but who cares, he like me, he thought I was hot. I am. If you want to be happy like Jack or Will from the best show ever "Will and Grace" than come out of the closet, thank you for reading.

Earl

I'd been having confusing feelings towards one of my male friends when I was 14. I didn't know what to make of it! I'd had crushes before on girls when I was younger but none of them were like this, I used to feel like crying at night.
These feelings continued for the whole of the next year, and I think it was during a lesson of sex education when someone asked me what my sexuality was, I told them I didn't know, I was really confused at the moment.
About a week later one of my best friends asked the same thing and I had to give him the same answer.
I realised I was gay on a Wednesday night while I was washing the dishes with my younger brother (at the time 12). We'd been watching Will and Grace earlier and while I was washing I suddenly thought "That's what it is, I'm Gay". At that instant I told my brother, he's really good, I can talk to him about anything. Once I'd done the dishes I went and told my mother, she understood too.
Then for a while I didn't do anything. I was playing with the idea in my head, 'trying it on', and it fit. I did a lot of research on the net then on how to come out and what it is to be gay. I read coming out stories to look for inspiration and I found one that said he'd come out by e-mail. I liked this idea so the next day, it was half term, I sent an e-mail to my bestest best friend telling her I was gay. The look one her face when I verified that it was true was really funny! I actually laughed! The next person I told I was talking to online, I said 'I'm gay' and she said 'Oh really? Me too!' Instilled with confidence at my successes, I decided to tell some of my male friends, face-to-face. They were really cool with it, one of them even said he'd suspected for about as long as I'd known, he just didn't want to insult me if he'd been wrong!
The final hurdle was in sight, my father... I had no idea how I was gonna do this one! Friends had sujested a text message, or a quick phone call "Dad, I'm gay" then hang up! I was considering writing a letter or to not tell him at all. But i realised it would be better sooner and not "Dad, this is my boyfriend..." kinda thing. I'd been preparing for weeks before telling him, I was expecting a real row! on the morning I was gonna do it I sent him a text telling him I had something I needed to say. He asked if it was anything interesting, I said 'Pretty interesting, yeh...' Later that day when I saw him he asked what it was but there were a few too many people around for my liking so I said I'd tell him later, gave me more time to prepare mentally! Well, we were gonaa go out on a ride on his Bike when he asked again. (I was wearing a leather jacket and crash helmet so I was safe.) I took a deep breath and just said "I'm gay". Amazingly, he didn't hit me or shout or anything! H e just said "Ah well, it's your life"!
I was shocked, I was silent all through dinner and for much of the day. For the first time in weeks I went to bed with a beaming grin on my face, I was so happy I felt invicible! It was like a huge weight had been lifted off my back!
If anything, it's taight me that you never know what people are gonna say till they say it. I'd been expecting an argument, a beating or even just silence! I'd thought my dad was homophobic, he's always the first to be taking the mickey out of an effeminate man!

Sarah

Well A lot of people ask me.....how did you know you were gay..at exactly what point in time did you know you were gay? And i think most people really dont know exactly what time or day they were hit with the big news that they were gay. But not me...Hi im sarah, and I can remember exactly what day the big news came to me. It was May 5th,2001. I was standing inline with my mother at a grocery store, when i was dazing out at a woman standing in line next to me. The first thing that came in my head was.."DAMNNNN". And then it hit me...like a big gay brick wall. That I was gay. Now it took me over 3 years to tell my parents. Well you see...my older sister is gay. so she sort of paved the way for me. I was driving along a country road with my mom, and we just started talking about life in general and i just told her. I was scared for a second but then she said "I want you to be happy, be yourself..and if it means your gay..then your gay. Im not mad, Im glad you ar e who you are" and that was it. she accepted me 100%. But my father was a whole different story. I was his only kid...and when i told him. He looked down at the floor and shook his head. He didnt speak to me after that. But now 2 years later, he accepts me, not 100% but probably 55%.

Eric

My Coming Out Story: Not So Much Bent As Twisted

From the beginning….*sigh*….. My name is Eric Harris I grew up locally in the fairly well to do area of Opaheke and as is customary for small suburban schools, with me as an intellectual person; I was more or less unpopular amongst the majority of my peers. I generally was reclusive-observant and fortunately due to the nature of my good friends (popular ones) I managed to endure most of my early childhood. Around standard two my dear parents stumbled upon the fact I was gifted, hence enlisting the help of the George Parkyn Centre for Gifted Education, as a result of this I was promptly allowed one day of school each week usually a Thursday to go off to another school in Pukekohe and learn with people of my own caliber. “Hurrah” I thought as I got to meet people who thought more or less on my own wavelength. Sadly this was not to last, with the rapidly approaching world of adolescence it slowly dawned on me that I might just be somewhat different from my friends.

Soon after I had left primary and begun Intermediate my “One Day School” attendance ceased to be. So forced to cope with the company of my fairly average classmates I quickly managed to fit in aided by the all new streamed class system of intermediate school. Generally speaking all was well until the inevitable happened and I moved up a whole new year and got my second male teacher. Perhaps you might have heard some of the indistinct rumors that float around still about my particular dealings with one Mr. Moodly. To put it shortly I really hated him and he knew it well, up to the point of me actually calling him a sadist and walking out of class, apparently he cried.

As a result of having to endure this particular year I became quite cynical and nasty and withdrawn. Spending a lot of the time alone I soon realized that far from the peeking from the boys changing rooms through the gaps into the girls changing rooms I was quite content on the side of the wall to which I was restricted. Besides this general male attraction I had also been fortunate enough to catch up with one of my friends from primary, one that I particularly began to like, thus my first crush.

Some full year later when the general hatred of my past teacher had worn off I finally summed up enough courage to turn around to my friend and tell him the truth and at the age of 14 I came out to best friend. Obviously he didn’t believe me (me being the great disguiser of my true sexuality) in fact he even required some sense of proof, let’s just say that night I lost something I can’t be given back. Needless to say we became very, very well acquainted even though he was straight. Sadly after some lengthy period of time with him starting work and living some distance away, we grew apart (but are still friends).

Having generally put my life into some perspective around about half way through fifth form I decided to tell my family I was gay. My eldest sister was the first to know because she saw me in a gay chat room on the net and so she was naturally fine with it. Some time later I told my parents. Due to my impeccable timing it was 1:30 in the morning. I asked my mother to stay in the car after a family outing and said the classic line “Mum I’m Gay”. After the somewhat expected “I’m concerned for your well being but there is nothing I can do about it” speech, I told my dad who gave me a hug and said it was ok. As you do. Finally about a month later I told my remaining sister. Funnily enough she was more upset that I told her last rather than any homosexual issue. Also of note I found out earlier that year that my grandmother had been diagnosed with caner of the brain.

Towards the end of the 5th form year my group of friends from primary school who I used to hang out with, out of school time, depleted. I tried using the internet to make friends but the relationships were mostly virtual based and not reality based hence any physical components were gone unanswered. So always on the uptake I decided to start going to ID a group run by Rainbow Youth organization. In doing so I made loads of new friends and after a period of about two to three months I met Seb, who soon became my first real boyfriend.

In sixth form I decided to tell my friends at school and also my deteriorating grandmother about my sexuality. My friends generally took it quite well soon realizing that I am exactly the same nasty evil bastard I was before telling them, if not somewhat nicer. Seb was totally awesome and came with me to my grandmother’s and has met her. I told her later in the evening about my sexuality and my relationship with Seb. Thankfully she is more concerned for my happiness than anything else despite a thoroughly catholic up-bringing; she even said “Well everyone is these days”. Even my aunt commented that I had good taste in guys

About half way through the year I took my boyfriend to the school ball, it was so awesome and I didn’t get any hassle whatsoever, just a few stares during the slow dances. So now I’m out at school and no one really seems to mind, I was almost disappointed that I didn’t get to argue with anyone.
As the year came to a close my grandmother got worse and worse, slowly losing her independence. I was fortunate enough to have my boyfriend there to support me as she went downhill and I came out to more of my aunts and cousins but as all good things come to an end Seb and I broke up late in November after which he treated me rather horribly, he ended up going out with one of my friends a week later and told me they broke up after a day. On Christmas day of 2004 at 7am my grandmother died peacefully at home with her family by her side, in her love and grace I shall remember her. Seb came back for the vigil and the funeral service in which I was a pall bearer and contributed to the eulogy. After the vigil he said some really stupid, hurtful things, so I slapped him and he almost went home, fortunately he stayed and supported me through a difficult process. Two weeks later I found out from a friend that when Seb told me he broke up with my friend he actually lied to me and they went out for a week and a half, I’m having trouble forgiving him.
However life goes on, I am in 7th form at school this year and was fortunate enough to take part in a local program which trains senior students to help guide their peers on sexual issues, we had a training camp which for many was truly life changing, after the HIV/AIDS workshop there wasn’t a dry eye in the house
Despite a traumatic and difficult start to the year, I can say that I have grown up a lot and in my coming out process I have only become stronger

All in all, my journey has been comparatively easy compared to some of the shocking horror stories I have heard from some people. Every day I am thankful that I have been fortunate enough to have been brought up in an open and accepting family, and that my friends are supportive of me regardless of my sexuality. I’m out and proud, and no one can take that away from me.

Andrew

Hello World!!!!!

My name is Andrew and here is my coming out story.

I WAS SO IN DENILE with my sexuality is was unreal.

I remember I was 12 and I was just outside my school and it was break. We had a Sixth Form connected to our school. And I saw one of the most hottest guys ever. And like what happenes I got an erection, but being 12 I thought it was just normal and never thought anything of it.
I few years later (2) I was 14 then I reolized I loved music and I was attracted to guys. I was extreamly scared and just to make sure I had one of my gay friends to kiss me. At this point I though i was Bi because it felt natural Now I'm sixteen. I had some guys who fancied me who I gave my number out to and they sent me txt (with personal fantasy msg's) my dad read it and beat the crap out of me. I was so down and Ran back in denile; But Back in July of 2004 I had a gf and recived a bj (sory for the gory details) it took me 2 and a half hours to come. And a few months ago I was a party and I was in a threesome girl guy and me. I recivred a bj and gave one and if felt so natural and right and I came in 20mins alot better than the girl. Now I have a girlfriend (I was still really in denile, But I'm going to finish with her very soon like tonight) because I first had sex with her last week and I felt so out of place and wrong and that is how I reolised I was gay.

Hope this story helps anyone. and if u have gone through any of being deep in denile or homophobic threats of parent or people e-mail me at slimzombiejim@hotmail.com

Darc Bolt Rain

Hewo there. I am Darc Bolt Rain, my real name's John, but that name is SOOOO boring!!! I hate it, so just call me Bolt, I like that MUCH better. I'm not from the UK, I'm sitting at my desk in the USA in Texas (I am NOT a cowboy, I HATE wearing hats, I NEVER say yee-haw, and I DON'T live on a farm, and I go to a REGULAR high school...I do say "y'all" a lot though, guess SOME stereotypes are true after all, but not many). I am also 17, CRAP, I'm getting OLD!!!

Nyah (that means "meow," like a cat, in Japanese, I say it lot and it's become involontary over the past few years, sorry if it starts to get annoying). My story is a bit long, so get ready for a good 10 minute read (actually it isn't THAT long, I'm just warning anyone who's a light reader). It's also not over...AT ALL. I guess we can start about 4 monthes ago (maybe a little less) when I woke up and it suddenly hit me, smack dab in the middle of my face, "OH MY GOSH!!! I'M EFING GAY!!!"

How I didn't see it before is BEYOND me. I never...NEVER, liked girls more than friends, so in elementary school and kindergarden, when all the other boys were confessing their love for girls by teasing them and making fun of them, I wasn't. Actually, I liked hanging out with girls more than I liked hanging out with guys. I always felt nervous around guys. That kind of nervousness that you get when you're around someone you might be interested in, but you don't want that person to know you're interested in them so you just sit quietly and stare at them and kind of feel uncomfortable yet slightly excited while you're sitting there staring. Yeah...that kind of nervousness. I also never went through a "girls are gross" stage that most little boys go through (actually, while most of the guys were takleing each other and running around, I was (ashamedly) having tea parties and joking around with the girls, I know, I know, that's so...GAY). I also LOVED yaoi (yaoi is a manga genre,
"manga" are Japanese comic books (a million and one times better than American comics, the art and story lines are WAY better), and "yaoi" means "guy love," and (alternativly) "yori" means "girl love," and I loved yaoi LONG before I realized I was gay). Of course I didn't understand it, I never looked at a guy and thought "WHOA!!! He's HOT!!!" (not before a few monthes ago anyway). And so it came as a shock when I realized I was gay.

It hapened on the internet when I was chatting with a guy friend and I suddenly blurted out (uh...typed out) "I REALLY like you" on the screen and hit "enter." I started freaking out wondering why the hell I wrote that when the guy typed back "really???...I like you too." And so (after a bit more typing and searching of my feelings) I found out I was gay, and EVERYTHING in my disaster of a social life made sense. The reason I liked yaoi, the reason I hung out with girls rather than guys, the reason I never loved anyone before in my entire life (I was starting to think that I was too cinical and emotionless to feel love and had actually given up on it). And I was HAPPY I was gay and I'm going to be really mad if I suddenly start liking girls. Anyway, I'm getting off topic (told you this was long).

The BIG coming out hasn't hapened yet, namely, coming out to my parents hasn't happened yet. That WON'T be happening until I find a boyfriend (I've never had one before, nyah, I've never had a girlfriend before either). I'm very lucky to have the friends I do. It was very easy coming out to them, mostly because they are HUGE yaoi fangirls (their the ones who got me hooked on those pationate, suspensful, heart-pounding love stories with guys kissing and hugging and protecting each other and all that other good, fun stuff, nyah, SOOO HOT and SOOO CUTE!!!). But really, I didn't come out to them on my own, once I figured out I was gay it was like I had it plastered on my shirt for all of them to read and they ALL found out within a week. I just CAN'T keep secrets from my friends, everytime I got near them and the issue of love or boys came up (which was pretty often sense were talking about a bunch of girls here) I started stutering and get flustered and bashful and they all ende d up asking "Bolt, is there something I should know???" and after more poking and proding I spilled my guts and blurted out "I'm GAY!!!"

Of course...those were all my girl friends, all my guy friends either don't see it, or are in denial about it. It is COMPLETELY, TOTALLY, and ULTIMATELY true that it is WAY easier to come out to a girl than it is to come out to a guy. Girls are understanding and sensitive, and even if they take it badly at first, they eventually (given a week or two) see that it isn't bad and you are who you are and that they should be happy for you and not mad or disapointed or scared. So coming out to girls is easy (actually, I recomend it, if you aren't sure or feel like you're up to coming out, GO TO A GIRL FIRST, they suport you and love you no matter what). Coming out to guys is a COMPLETELY diferent story.

I've actually only come out to TWO of my guy friends (and they're leaving this year since they're a seniors, so I'll basically have NO guy friends who know about me being what I am). The reason it's hard is because guys are extreamly unpredictable, rude, and don't think about what they're saying before they say it. When you hear gay jokes and people saying "fag" and "queer" and beating up others, who is it??? GUYS!!! (There is of course the occational exception, there is ALWAYS an exception, but most all of the time (99.9999999...%) it's guys).

When I was on my band trip (GO BAND!!!) I was rooming with 3 other guys, 4 guys to every 2 beds. This was not my first band trip, but this was my first band trip being (or realizing I was) gay. Now I had NO sexual, phsyical, or emotional atracion for these guys (trust me, I don't even know how their girlfriends can stand them) and that's not the point I'm trying to make. It's that I was in a room with 3 other guys and what's the first thing that comes out of their mouthes??? Gay jokes, FOR 30 MINUTES STRAIGHT!!! I felt like the lowest scum on either, and the point here is that, guys DON'T THINK (ok, STRAIGHT guys don't think, most of us gay guys are pretty understanding and sympathetic and watch our mothes...for the most part). It didn't once occur to them that one of their room mates JUST MIGHT be gay. It was the WORST night of my life, they were running around acting like maniacs, pretending to hump each other and pinning each other down and joke-threatening to kiss them (o ne of them, THE ONE I WAS SLEEPING WITH, even got NAKED in bed, MY GOSH, I freaked out).

So the whole point of the story is that guys don't think and that's why it's hard to tell them. It's hard to admit that you're gay when your best friend makes gay jokes and calls other gays "pansies" and "faries" and "queers" and "fags." So when I told one of my guy friend I was stutering for 10 minutes and even thought of just running out of the room we were talking in, but (to my suprise, not a huge suprise, but a suprise none-the-less) when I told him, he didn't flip out and he didn't run out of the room screaming, he actually took it fairly well and didn't really care, he was my friend and it didn't mater that I was gay. Now, I'm not saying that's going to happen all the time, I tryed that with one of my other guy friends and he completely flipped out and doesn't even speak or look at me any more (actually he's STARTING to come around and realize that it doesn't mater that I'm gay, that I'm still the same person I was before, I just like guys). I'm sorry to say he was a g ood friend and I hated loosing him, but if he can't handle a simple fact like my sexuality, then that's his problem, not mine (I might have been really depressed for a few days, but I got over it soon enough, and you will too if you loose a friend because of your sexuality).

So I've got one foot out of the closet (YEAH, go me) I've told most of my friends and I've never felt better about being gay. It seems that the hardest part is yet to come, family. I'll have to get back to you on that later...much later. I'll tell my parents soon...........eventually.............in a few years.................when I'm married.........when they're on their death beds................maybe..........